It's been a while since I've blogged, but I don't have to tell you that. So, where have I been all this time? Still in the same town, though my outlook is very different.
Perhaps you've heard of the phrase 'a dark night of the soul'? Well, I don't think what I've gone through is that drastic, but depression was very much an issue.
It's hard to go from a very familiar place, surrounded by friends to a two-bedroom apartment all by yourself and no clear direction in your job.
I'm not going to go into details, but I have been praying and I know people have been praying for me and I've been hungry for Scripture in a way I hadn't been in a while. The other night I was looking up phrases like 'lonely' in my concordance and finally started reading the book of Job. I've cried, I've prayed, I've gotten angry. I've even questioned whether or not I made the right choice in moving here.
Don't get me wrong, there are things I love here. I am starting to get more accustomed to my job. Though I still don't know how to grow a youth group out of no youth, I do know that God is in control. I pray that he will bring the kids he wants to come and I have to trust him for that. The Holy Spirit does the prompting, I'm just a vessel.
Trust me, there have been plenty of opportunities to laugh. Here are a few:
-going to a small town council meeting. "Reidsville...in the house!"
-seeing a fence with a giant welcome sign and a small no tresspassing sign right beside it
-eating at a second resteraunt that had brains on the menu
-being told the confederate soldier made of stone in the middle of town is a 'monument', not a 'soldier statue'
-trying to buy coffee after 8 at night or animal crackers on a Sunday morning- nothing's open!
-having a 4-year-old at church who named one of his toy cars 'Snot Rider'
-having a patriotic service on JUNE 4
-taking Bella on a walk down Main Street, having the leash break, and carrying her like a baby back up Main Street, around the corner, past City Hall and the police station
-taking Bella on a walk down Main Street with her new leash and deciding to clean up her poop in Bank of America's front lawn even though they charged me overdraft fees
-going door-to-door to advertise our children's and youth programs and having a dresser on someone's front porch fall on me
Oh, there are many other things. But I suppose the most significant thing is a serious thing. It's how God is teaching me to rely on him in a way I haven't had to in a long time.
I may not like not having a roommate or a job where I am not sure what to do next, but God is walking me through it. And for that, as well as other things, I am thankful.
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