Friday, February 22, 2008

The Restaurant Formerly Known as Popeyes

I would like to dedicate this post to someone very dear to me. May you always secretly like Blondie's "Heart of Glass" and never give up saving the pandas. You're right, they are cute.

Now for a great story.

For those of you from North Carolina, you probably did not grow up eating at Popeyes. The better alternative to Bojangles (Popeyes is international whereas Bojangles is only in select states), it is only found in a few rare places in The Old North State.

My friend Whitney and I headed to Fayetteville in search of some chicken goodness. We easily found two Popeyes locations online: the Raleigh airport and Ft. Bragg. Since we didn't have access to the airport terminals and my military privileges expired two and a half years ago, things didn't look good.

But there was hope! Through a Google search, Whitney found a Popeyes on Gillespie Street in Fayetteville. We started our trek.

Our trip involved a few shady parts of Fayetteville, but it was nothing we couldn't handle. We looked and looked and finally a familiar building caught Whitney's eye. It looked like a Popeyes! Or what was once a Popeyes. The sign was stripped and it looked vacant.

We had to investigate and find out if it was time to give up our Popeyes search. Upon entering the parking lot we saw that there were, indeed, cars. Then we noticed the large white signs on several windows with the cartoon drawing of an older man (who bore a strange resemblance to an aged Fat Albert) and the words "Fat Milton's".

That's right, we were in the parking lot of a Fat Milton's. Whitney bravely went inside to see if it had formerly been a Popeyes. While she went in I snapped a picture on my cell phone of one of the signs. When Whitney came out she informed me that it did used to be a Popeyes and that there was only one pan of chicken and a couple sides. Looked like Fat Milton wouldn't be fat for long.

As we were getting back into the car, a young gentleman approached the restaurant in a rather heavy fur coat. It being North Carolina, the heavy clothing item didn't seem necessary. Apparently I took too long getting the door unlocked as Whitney stood nervously outside my car. The young pedestrian took a rather shady look into the car beside mine and then proceeded to enter Fat Milton's.

We got out of there.

I needed to know if there was any more hope for a Faytteville Popeyes. I called 411 and the man informed me of the locations we knew about, including Gillespie Street. I asked him if he thought the one was actually on the base and he did. I asked him if he knew of any others in the area, he didn't. I told him the Popeyes on Gillespie Street was no longer a Popeyes. Whitney and I ate at Bojangles with a trip to Ruby Tuesday's for dessert.

You can't make up stories like this. Fat Milton's was beyond incredible. As we drove around the building to get away I noticed that only half of the drive-thru menu was still intact.

I have heard Fayetteville referred to as the armpit of North Carolina. While it does have some redeeming qualities, I think it's safe to say that we discovered that that nickname is rather appropriate.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Online Medical Advice

I am a dork, I know this.

I like to go to webmd.com and use the symptom checker. Since I don't normally have strange diseases, I like to make up symptoms.

Tonight I entered what I thought were fairly normal symptoms. The last disease on the list of possible ailments was Mad Cow Disease.

Watch out for anxiety in your head brought on by emotional stress.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Advertising Marvel

I was baby-sitting last night when I came across a knife magazine. I'm not sure that I've ever seen a knife magazine before, but it got me thinking.

About commericals.

Particuarly a Ginsu World Class commerical that aired when I was a kid. I could watch this knife commerical over and over as the blade cut through an iron pipe and a tomato. There was something about the swiftness that the actor had with the blade that glued me to the commercial.

It was amazing what you could get for a check or money order.